Sunday, October 28, 2007

The Most Amazing Ending to a Game I Have EVER Seen

Woke up to stumble on to this gem this morning. Sure, it's only Division III football; but this easily the most exciting play I have ever seen end a sporting event.

Friday, October 26, 2007

LNAH Hockey Fights

With the NHL turning soft on us (actually fights are up this year, but its the "lesss than heavy" guys that are fighting), let's turn our attention to a league where you are almost guaranteed 2+ fights a night per game... the LNAH. A little about the LNAH for Wiki:

The Ligue Nord-Américaine de Hockey (LNAH) was founded in 2004 and is a low-level professional league based in the Canadian province of Quebec. It was called the Quebec Semi-Pro Hockey League from 1996 to 2004 when it turned pro. It has no connection with the similarly-named North American Hockey League (NAHL), an American junior league for players under twenty.

Unlike higher-level professional leagues, such as the American Hockey League or the ECHL, the LNAH is not known for its skill level. Its teams employ many enforcers and has a rather infamous reputation for on-ice antics that mostly include fisticuffs. The LNAH has the unofficial reputation as the world's roughest hockey league.

I really don't know where to start with the LNAH. There are line-brawls on a weekly basis. I would liken a lot of the tough guys to an early-version of Tie Domi, as they dust off their hands, shadow box, and do other entertaining things to play to the crowd before and after fights. You can expect a fight a night per tough guy. It's not like the NHL where 25 fights might lead the league at the end of the year. Some of these guys will have more than 25 fights midway through the year. There are a lot of goals scored in games which keeps things fun for the finesse fans as well.

But really, if you go to watch an LNAH game, you know what you are in store for. Former NHLers Link Gaetz and Gino Odjick have played in the league. It is rumored, although I don't think it is much of a rumor, that Link got paid by the fight. Legendary AHLer Frank "the Animal" Bialowas played in the LNAH. Caps tough guy Donald Brashear played in the LNAH during the lockout and was promptly banned from the league after punching his opponent multiple times while he was down. Former AHLers Brandon Sugden and Sean McMorrow currently play. Rumored-to-be a Hershey Bear last year, Steve Bosse, resides as the current champ of the league. Current Syracuse Crunch that can't find his way into a game, Jon "Nasty" Mirasty, is #2 behind Bosse and is probably the most entertaining fighter in the world today.

So the only way to really explain the LNAH is to watch some of these guys in action for yourself.... enjoy!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Zdeno Chara Pounds David Koci

Apparently Koci had his nose broken two nights ago. A solid right by Chara opened it up again and a bloody mess ensued.


Belak breaking Koci's nose:

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Huge Chris Simon article...

This one from Sports Illustrated's Michael Farber. A couple of quotables:

Darryl Bootland, a nondescript New York Islanders winger, and Riley Cote, a fourth liner for the Philadelphia Flyers, were standing beside each other at the face-off circle in the second period on the night of Oct. 13, jostling with their sticks and engaging in repartee that was more Oscar De La Hoya than Oscar Wilde.

"Why d'ya look so angry all the time?" Bootland demanded.

"'Cause that's my job," Cote replied.

When Cote lifted Bootland's stick and it caught its owner in the face, the contretemps became Chris Simon's job.

Now Simon, sprung from his personal purgatory, switched sides ... or at least moved from the right to the left side of the circle so he could line up next to Cote. "Simon looks at me, and he's like, 'What's up?' " Cote said. "And I said, 'Are we going to do this?' And he's like, 'Yup.' That's kinda [how] it happens."

Monday, October 22, 2007

Caps Finally Show Some Toughness

Donald Brashear -vs- Georges Laraque

Arguably the two best heavyweights in the game today, these two squared off on Saturday night. Laraque looked to catch Brashear early on with a left. Brashear went to a knee twice and Laraque continued to throw while Brashear was getting up, but couldn't put the Cap away. Brashear rights himself and throws two solid lefts, the first hitting helmet and the second looking to land flush on Laraque's forehead knocking the Penguin off his skates and to the ice.

Friday, October 12, 2007

More Modifications to NHL Uniforms on the Horizon

New York - Gary Bettman, Commissioner of the new NHL, has proposed more radical changes to all NHL uniforms. Citing aesthetic preferences, Bettman has sent marketing DVDs to team owners in hopes that they will approve the changes at the upcoming Board of Governors meeting.

At his press conference, Bettman, who would not go into exact details about the modifications, said:

"This is not a revenue-generating initiative. We have tested these new uniforms and they make the players 10% faster than they were in 2005-2006. That is a 2% improvement over what the Reebok jerseys. Not only that, but sweat absolutely cannot be trapped in these uniforms. These are ultra skin tight. And that is why I have cleared my schedule to attend all Detroit Red Wings game this year. I've had my eye on Dominik Hasek for years. I can't wait to see how the uniform flexes when he kicks out for a save."

Twominutes has obtained an exclusive copy of the marketing DVD and has posted it here for you to view. Accoring to an NHL source, the video depicts exactly what an NHL player could do in these uniforms during a live game. The source noted that "this video is accurate. We tested all of the maneuvers you see in it."

Just so we're all on the same page, this was an "Onion" moment for me. Sorry, couldn't help myself.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Team-by-Team Fighters List

Me and a couple of guys over at Fried Chickens put our noggins together to come up with a list of tough guys for each team. We also included "in the system" minor league guys that can be called up to fill holes if need be.

We even sorted by weight class, which more so is based on fighting ability and who guys have danced with in the past. The designations are:

HW = Heavyweight CW = Cruiserweight MW = Middleweight

Anaheim Mighty Ducks:

George Parros (HW)
Brad May (HW)
Travis Moen (CW)
Shane Hnidy (MW)
Sean O'Donnell (CW)

In the system: Mike Hoffman (HW), Geoff Peters (MW), Dan Lacouture (MW)

Atlanta Thrashers:

Eric Boulton (HW)
Chris Thorburn (MW)
Garnett Exelby (MW)

In the system: Boris Valabik (HW)

Boston Bruins:

Shawn Thornton (HW)
Jeremy Reich (CW)
Milan Lucic (CW)
Andrew Alberts (CW)

In the system: Steve McIntyre (HW), Nathan Saunders (CW)

Buffalo Sabres:

Andrew Peters (HW)
Adam Mair (CW)
Paul Gaustad (MW)
Nathan Paetsch (MW)

Calgary Flames:

Eric Godard (HW)
Wayne Primeau (CW)
Mark Smith (MW)
Dion Phaneuf (CW)
Jarome Iginla (CW)
Cory Sarich (MW)

In the system: Brandon Prust (CW)

Carolina Hurricanes:

Mike Commodore (CW)
Tim Gleason (CW)
Craig Adams (MW)
Scott Walker (MW)

In the system: Wade Brookbank (HW), Trevor Gillies (HW)

Colorado Avalanche:

Scott Parker (HW)
Ian Lapperiere (CW)

In the system: Cody McLeod (CW), Cody McCormick, (MW), Mitch Love, Dale Purinton (HW)

Chicago Blackhawks:

David Koci (HW)
Jim Vandermeer (CW)
Danny Richmond (MW)
Martin Lapointe (CW)
James Wisniewski (MW)

Columbus BlueJackets:

Jody Shelley (HW)
Jarred Boll (CW)
Kristian-Ole Tollefson (MW)

In the system: Tom Sestito (CW), Zenon Konopka (CW)

Dallas Stars:

Todd Fedoruk (HW)
Steve Ott (MW)
Krys Barch (CW)
Brad Winchester (HW)
Brendan Morrow (MW)

In the system: B.J. Crombeen (HW), Mark Fistric (HW)

Detroit Red Wings:

Dallas Drake (MW)
Aaron Downey (HW)

Edmonton Oilers:

JF Jacques (MW)
Matt Greene (CW)
Sheldon Souray (CW)
Ethan Moreau (MW)
Steve Staios (MW)

In the system: Zach Stortini (HW), Bryan Young, Ryan Flinn (HW), Theo Peckham (CW)

Florida Panthers:

Steve Montador (CW)
Bryan Allen (CW)
Greg Campbell (MW)

In the system: Anthony Stewart (MW)

Los Angeles Kings:

Raitis Ivanans (HW)
Scott Thornton (HW)

In the system: Paul Crosty (HW), Kevin Westgarth (HW)

Minnesota Wild:

Derek Boogaard (HW)
Stephanne Veilleux (MW)

In the system: Aaron Voros (HW), Matt Kassian (HW), Riley Emmerson, John Scott (HW)


Montreal Canadiens:

Tom Kostopolous (MW)
Garth Murray (CW)
Steve Begin (MW)
Mike Komisarek (CW)
Ryan O'Byrne (CW)

In the system: Jimmy Bonneau (HW)

Nashville Predators:

Darcy Hordichuk (HW)
Scott Nichol (MW)
Jordin Tootoo (MW)

In the system: Nolan Yonkman (CW), Alex Henry (HW)

New Jersey Devils:

Cam Janssen (HW)
Mike Rupp (CW)
Arron Asham (CW)
Sheldon Brookbank (CW)
David Clarkson (CW)

In the system: Grant Marshall (CW), Jean-Luc Grand-Pierre (CW), Pierre-Luc Leblond (CW)

New York Islanders:

Chris Simon (HW)
Darryl Bootland (MW)
Andy Sutton (CW)
Brendan Witt (CW)
Bill Guerin (CW)

In the system: Gordie Dwyer (CW), Tim Jackman (CW), Kip Brennan (HW), Matt Spiller (CW)

New York Rangers:

Colton Orr (HW)
Ryan Hollweg (MW)
Jason Strudwick (HW)
Sean Avery (MW)
Brendan Shanahan (CW)

In the system: Dane Byers (CW), Francis Lessard (HW), Dave Liffiton (CW), Mitch Fritz (HW)

Ottawa Senators:

Brian McGratton (HW)
Chris Neil (CW)
Mike Fisher (MW)

In the system: Danny Bois (CW), Matt Carkner (HW), Jeremy Yablonski (HW), Greg Amadio (CW)

Philadelphia Flyers:

Jesse Boulerice (HW)
Riley Cote (HW)
Ben Eager (CW)
Mike Richards (MW)

In the system: Tristan Grant (HW), Martin Grenier (HW), Gino Pisselini (CW)

Phoenix Coyotes:

Josh Gratton (HW)
Daniel Carcillo (MW)
Nick Boynton (CW)
Keith Ballard (MW)

In the system: Kevin Cormier, Craig Weller (HW)

Pittsburgh Penguins:

Georges Laraque (HW)
Jarkko Ruutu (MW)
Maxime Talbot (MW)
Gary Roberts (MW)

In the system: Aaron Boogaard (HW), Dennis Bonvie (HW), Ryan Stone (CW), Deryk Engelland (CW)


San Jose Sharks:

Brad Norton (HW)
Rob Davison (CW)
Ryan Clowe (MW)
Doug Murray (CW)

In the system: Jonathan Tremblay (HW), Brad Staubitz, Brennan Evans (CW)

St.Louis Blues:

DJ King (HW)
Matt Walker (HW)
Jamal Mayers (CW)
Barrett Jackman (CW)
Dan Hinote (MW)

In the system: Anthony Peluso, Hans Benson (HW)

Tampa Bay Lightning:

Andre Roy (HW)
Shane O'Brien (CW)
Nick Tarnasky (CW)
Chris Gratton (CW)

In the system: Mike Egener (HW), Jay Leach (CW), Karl Stewart (MW), Dan Jancevski (CW)

Toronto Maple Leafs:

Wade Belak (HW)
Kris Newbury (MW)
Darcy Tucker (MW)

In the system: Ben Ondrus (MW), Brad Brown (HW), David Ling (MW)

Vancouver Canucks:

Jeff Cowan (CW)
Kevin Bieksa (MW)
Byron Ritchie (MW)
Alex Burrows (MW)

In the system: Rick Rypien, Mike Brown (MW), Nate McIver (CW)

Washington Capitals:

Donald Brashear (HW)
John Erskine (HW)
Brian Sutherby (CW)
Matt Bradley (CW)
Chris Clark (MW)

In the system: Ben Clymer (MW), Grant McNeil (HW), Chris McAllister (HW), Dean Arsene (CW)

Monday, October 8, 2007

Clean Hit by Neil Shelves Superstar Avery

Sean Avery is hurt... again. Guess he won't be making the Islanders game, you know the one he wanted to play in sooo bad because he is sooo good at policing the ice.

But nope, Chris Neil walloped Avery with a clean open ice hit the other night, sending Avery to the locker room and sidelining him for four weeks with a separated shoulder. Of course the hit resulted in an elbowing call for Neil. Sadly enough, its yet another example of Bettman's zebras being oversensitive to what are really clean hits. Watching Neil's elbow as comes in... it's down and so is Avery.

I tried to find some Avery comments about Neil but was unsuccessful. No worries, the inevitable 'Chris Neil is a thug and I am a goal scoring machine" comments will be in the presses soon enough.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

NHL Enforcer Articles - Time to Play Catch Up

I openly admit that my blog lacks focus. Really I just use this space to write what is on my mind (which can get cluttered - I have self-diagnosed a touch of ADD). That could be that Gary Bettman is running what was once a great sport into the ground (I almost lost my dinner last night when he popped up on the Caps game). That could mean providing some updates about the Capitals (I am a hockey friendly blog according to their website you know). And/or that could mean writing about the true characters of hockey, the tough guys (you know, the ones that make the fans cheer even louder than when a goal is scored - that burns that anti-fight crowd).

Being that Gary and the Caps have dominated TwoMinutes (this is the premeir TwoMinutes blog out there!) the last couple of entries, it's time to play catch up on some great enforcer articles.

Anyone heard of this Milan Lucic character? Do a YouTube on him. The kid is tough as nails.

The Boston Herald has taken notice... not once, but twice in the past couple of days.

Lucic took on Brad Winchester last night by the way, earning a solid edge against the opposing youngster. This was one second after the main event, Todd Fedorek -vs- Scott Thornton.

Anyone heard of this dope? Mr. Corbet writes that Dennis Bonvie might literally kill someone on the ice one day. He failed to mention that Bonvie is probably in his last season in the AHL and he hasn't come close to killing anyone in a 10+ year career. Corbet also plays the parent/child communication card, saying that parents have a hard time explaining why grown men are fighting on the ice.

To Dopey Corbet, I say this... Any ARTICULATE parent doesn't have that problem. If you can't explain to your child that what is happening on the ice is not what should happen at school, then you had problems communicating with your child BEFORE you got to the rink.

Mr. Corbet is just another anti-fight writer trying to make a name for himself. Thank you for joining the Beat Up As A Kid link on Twominutes dope. (Side note - a poster at Fried Chickens found a very interesting article questioning Corbet's ethics. Good read... scroll down for the article and bolded section.)

Anyone see the Jon Mirasty got a part-time offer with the Syracuse Crunch? YouTube Mirasty (he goes by the nickname Nasty Mirasty) and you will see that this guy is an absolute animal. Be sure to skip the Steve Bosse fights (he was rumored to be signed by Hershey last year). Mirasty has a hard time against Steve.

Hey, Donald Brashear builds homes! I don't know why that is important. But it's worth a quick read.

A Lappy story out of the Denver Post. Laperriere is a warrior. And it just so happens that he found Mr. Tootoo the other night against the Predators. Someone's not wasting time, eh?

Olli Jokinen says that the Panthers need an enforcer. But of course Jacques Martin would prefer not to "waste" a spot on a guy that doesn't play that much. And of yeah, the Panthers are "team tough." Yeah, that's what every team that lacks an enforcer says, true or not. Has anyone noticed that we have 30 "team tough" teams in the NHL? I haven't.

Speaking of NOT being team tough, the Detroit Red Wings cut Aaron Downey. This after keeping him on the roster through all of pre-season AND the first game of the season. No worries once again, the Wings are team tough too because they once had Brendan Shanahan and Bob Probert and Joe Kocur and... seriously, how embarrassing is it to be a Wings fan right now?

Derek Boogaard (the apparent second coming of Bob Probert) got edged out by David Koci the other night in a slug fest (in which many punches didn't land). Minnesota fans are in denial about this one. Psst... it's okay if the big guy loses every now and then.

Gary Bettman wants to get hit-to-hurt guys out of the NHL so much so that he had his lap dog, Collie (seriously, Bettman calls him this) Campbell, call the Islanders (Hollweg), Predators (Tootoo), and Wild (Boogaard). Apparently these guys will be "watched closely" this year.

That is the NHL for you folks... objective as ever. These three guys couldn't take a $@)! without the NHL inspecting it, especially Boogaard who actually got a penalty for getting punched in the eye the other night.

Ah yes, on to Steve Downie, who the AHL has decided to suspend for a month of play. The NHL has made Downie the face of "hit-to-hurt" players. Nice job making an example out of A KID that hasn't even played in an NHL game. For some background on Downie, read this article posted at Flyersphans.

More on hit-to-hurt player, Jordin Tootoo. Looks like he cheated on Kellie Pickler. Can't really say I blame him. He's young. He's a star in Nashville. And there are so many hot single chicks in Nashville, it's not even funny. Well I guess he could have broken up with her first, then had some fun. Gross misconduct! Oh yes, the "new NHL" doesn't have that traditional penalty anymore.

Just a quick tid bit on Bettman. Last night, he said there are rumors that ESPN is interested in the NHL. He better play smart on this one. Versus can't carry ESPN's jock. Nuff said.

My top ten heavyweights going into the season:

Laraque (he'd better fight more this year or he drops)
King (he was GREAT in his short stint last year)
Shelly (although I’m not that high on his fighting ability anymore)

Darkhorse - Mr. Koci, George Parros (for frequency, not results)

Finally, I actually gave away four tickets to opening night at the Verizon Center tonight. 200 level at center ice. Who, in their right mind, would pay to see one of the softest teams on ice, the Carolina Hurricanes, play?

Friday, October 5, 2007

$258 to Take a Family of Four to an NHL Game

And I rounded down...

To all those that say that hockey is a family friendly sport, I point you to the Team Marketing Report.

Some quick hits from their Fan Cost survey, now going on its 15th year:

The most expensive team to see play is the Montreal Canadians at a whopping $332.

The Phoenix Coyotes are in last (just like in the standings) at $181.

If I have one more kid, that will give me four in my family and we can go see a Washington Capitals game for a cool $230... pocket change, right?

The most expensive beer goes to Los Angeles at $7.25. Dallas (yeehaw!) charges almost half as much ($4).

It looks like Florida (21%), Carolina (28%), and St. Louis (17% because they packed em in like sardines last year...) feel its time to start charging families more to see a game this year compared to last.

And oh yes, 18 teams have raised the average ticket price, 10 teams did not change their price, and 2 actually dropped ticket prices (one of which is Toronto who still has the second highest ticket price of all NHL teams).

So to all those dopes out there that think it is reasonable for a family of four to see an NHL game, think again. And all that coin for what owners will even refer to as a niche sport... oh yes, they're just covering the t.v. ratings debacle when they do that. I forgot.